Canine Unit Member Gifts

'I wish I could do Search and Rescue too: When you're a Police Dog, the people you find don't actually want to be found...'

"You can't just yell, 'Get him!' You've gotta tell me he's got bacon in his pockets or something."

Playing Fetch.

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

"Foster failure"

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

"You were right: I don't like water, but I do love snow!"

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Is this any way to treat 'Man's best friend'?"

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

A man and his dog

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

Hush puppy.

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

"I'm working from home today."

Wagging Dog

'You're not supposed to catch them!'

Dogs

"I could catch a bicyclist, well maybe not a bicyclist, but I could catch a jogger, definitely."

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

'It's normal, don't worry, people on the street just love patting puppies...'

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."