Canine Mischief Manager Gifts

"I'm not angry, but in the future I’d prefer it if you chewed up her Sue Graftons, not my P.G. Wodehouses."

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

Mittens is challenged by the string.

Rusty, not believing in God, seized his chance...

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'Everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other.'

Dogs life

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

'He licked all my tongue depressors.'

"Thank God you're home. Someone crapped on the carpet again."

Gary misread the new policy on 'Free Thinking' in the work place.

"Pssst. Fake poop."

"While you were out, the staff whittled away your desk into a totem pole."

Two children play with a pedal bin

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

"Thank goodness for pet doors because the alarm on my piddle clock was about to ring on the rug."

'The part I love is when they come home and say 'WHO did this?. . .'

'Don't worry, son. This bed inking incident will be our little secret.'

'Should-do and shouldn't-do sound a lot alike.'

Teacher's pet dog

"Come on boy. Tell Daddy where you buried the leg of lamb."

'I'm sure they don't think you're really a bad kitty...just a kitty that sometimes does bad things.'

"Whoever dug up my carrots had better learn to play dead, fast."