Canine Culinary Enthusiast Pillows

Dog Food: Lick & Collect

"It's a new cereal for dogs."

"Parts of a dog" "Hears food drop" "Smells food" "Chews food" "Swallows food" "Digests food" "Moves toward food" "Signals for food" "Makes room for more food"

"Bungle the flip! Bungle the flip!"

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

Dog Chow Mein

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

Homemade dog biscuits.

'Rover is sulking because he helped bag the goose and all he gets for dinner is dog food.'

"Kibbled, canned and frozen were non-starters. But he'll often accept a ice ribeye as long as it's been properly dry aged."

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

'Sure, it's a nice buffet, but I can't help thinking it's a bit morbid...'

Posh dog views expensive food and wine.

'That's not exactly what I had in mind.'

'I don't care if top breeders do recommend it - I am not going to eat dog food!'

"He won't wait for me to open the can."

'I pity the poor schlub whose job it is to make that call.'

"Look, I’m sorry - it’s not Asian fusion night!"

"Could we have a doggy bag please?"

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?"

'Dang! Oh well, I won't have to feed him for a year now.'

"Some dehydrated corn and bone meal for the gentleman, perhaps?"

'So you want two opposable thumbs so you can open your own dogfood?'

"Not only do these new treats taste like table scraps, they're also good for you."

"We'll have the people food."

Cooking shows for dogs

Limits of Canine Philosophical Inquiry.

'I can understand my mother and my first-grade teacher being there, but there's also a TV announcer who does dog commercials and a second-string catcher for the Detroit Tigers.'

"Have you got a book about the proper way of feeding a dog?"

'I'm thinking celebrity pet's cookery nightmare make-over...'

"Well-done coming right up."

'I'll take your word for it that dog food tastes good on crackers.'

Sure, it's nice when Master gives us a bone, but frankly, I would prefer a juicy steak...

The Four Basic Food Groups - Dry, moist, biscuit, bone.