Canine Conundrum Solver Pillows

'This way I keep the law and don't get grossed out.'

"Hmm, great! - no sign of that dog..."

'Honey must not like you! She's never bitten anyone before.'

'I wonder if they have any water filters?'

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

In life there are things we cannot understand � the words 'get down,' invisible fences, cats...

"If you'd like to take a seat."

Tech support...can I help you!

Communication Breakdowns

"I'll give you a moment."

"They didn't have a cone that fit my head."

'I told him over and over again never to press 'delete' more than twice!'

Our Computer is Up/Down.

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

'Enough of my tapeworm - tell me about your fleas.'

Woman tangled up ironing

Damned if you do...

"Look, if it wasn’t me and it wasn’t you, who was doing all the snoring?!"

'We did a catscan on him and we still don't know why they purr.'

'Some things are better left unsaid but I never know what they are until after I've said them.'

'I wonder if this needle will do....'

Life irritates art

Three-eyed man beats three card monte game.

"Hello? IT support? I think my hard drive is fragmented."

Buttons read - OK/Not OK/I'm OK but I still want to cancel.

"We can't let the king die, but we also can't do anything that suggests he needs saving..."

' Emergency Pet Hospital? My Basset Hound got into my husband's Viagara...'

'Phew, now, where can i plug my mobile in?'

Hard of Hearing Institute.

'You have 17 new conflicting messages...'

'Sammy's going to take you for a little walk.'

"I did my homework, but it got lost in cyberspace."

"I think we're supposed to connect the positive wire here and the negative wire there. But I can't."

'Fetching the paper was a lot easier than Googling it and printing it.'

'That's what you get for not updating acrobat reader.'