Canine Chef Humor Pillows

'I was hoping chef's surprise would be fish'

Dog Hunting Trophies.

Raw food, after you leave for work.

It turns out they don't go together so well,

'I think I'll go home and eat'

"No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"Ugh—someone in the group chat must have seen a squirrel."

"Is that all they taught him at obedience school? How to use a can opener?"

"Yeah well, now that we're married, he's not making any effort: he hasn't been to a grooming appointment in months!"

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

Alphabet soup

"Pretty good dog, huh, Larry?"

"I need a hip replacement but I believe they're looking at a dog replacement."

Dogs texting each other emojis

Homemade dog biscuits.

"You're spoiling that dog again!"

Three Pigs.

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

"We need to put in more bones."

"For supper tonight, we'll have pizza, and cold pizza for dessert."

Dog leaving operating theatre in a hurry with a bone in his mouth

'The two things you cook best are meatloaf and apple pie!... Which one is this?'

"So, what's it to be, chicken unfit for human consumption, or beef unfit for human consumption?"

"For this dish we'll need to sauté the onion with the week-old, moldy, ant-covered French fry over medium heat. Then, we lightly flash boil our dehydrated mouse..."

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

"Tonight I'm making spotted bass. Tomorrow night, spotted spaghetti."

Recipes.

"Much of his cooking suffers from burn-out."

Noodle exchange program.

"No, honest, I just sat on a squeaky toy."