Canine Casanova T-Shirts

"Of course, all the good ones are fixed."

"Talk nerdy to me."

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

I love you. You're my everything. Mixed Message Arts.

'Our basic package is no frills, no chew toys, no extra Kibbles, and narry a pat on the head from management...'

"Our online romance needs fresh start. I think it's time to hit 'ctrl', 'alt', 'delete'."

A masked man serenading

"Okay, who's purring?"

"We met the old fashioned way – online, in a chat room."

'Going my way, gorgeous?'

'I like you, Susan, you have an intuitive interface.'

'This new star sends out periodic pulses in a very appealing rhythm -- I think I'll name it 'Bossa Nova.''

Slow, merge left, resume speed, stop, stay, sit, roll over, good boy!

Florist. You're taking your new girlfriend to the aviary for Valentine's Day? Yes -- It's a cheap date.

"How much am I bid, for the death mask of Casanova?"

Dogs playing strip poker.

Man's Best Friend - Man's Worst Friend - Man's Only Friend

"A guard dog?! You think you're a guard dog!

"You are a very beauty woman. May I buy you a coke?"

"You're always trying too hard, Eddie!"

"You blame this on the 4 martinis I drank. I blame it on the Bossa Nova."

Witches

Bit on the side

'C'mon in. You can leave your shoes on, but stay off the furniture.'

Penetrating Pet Disguises...

'Raise your paw for the corresponding ear when you hear the sound of a can opener.'

Blame it on the Bossa Nova

"I knew the market was back when I no longer had to date age appropriate women."

"Actually, you're kinda cute. I don't see why a girl like you and a guy like me can't...."

I've been reduced to extreme measures. Randy? Is that you? This is the only way to prevent myself from hitting on gals. I can't be allowed to see or smell them. Of for them to see or hear me: My strong but tender hands, the lips that whisper like a gentle ocean breeze, the ... Oh, no! My turn-of-phrase is too sexy to be contained by a shroud! An ocean breeze with bad coffee breath.