Campus Cap Wearer Pillows

'Nice resume but graduating 'summa cum student loan' isn't really something to brag about.'

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'The sound of one hand clapping.'

I'm getting ready to apply for college. Do you have a list of party schools?

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

Graduate

'We're all getting older ok!' 'These days I'm down to the speed of sound!'

The Giamatti era

Zumma Cum Laude

Superhero

"About these experiements of yours into genetic cloning, Bond" boomed the Headmaster, "They must cease immediately"

Graduate of 2021

Awesome. Now let's try this with bottles.

"The best part is, for me history is now history!"

'...Then touch your toes twenty times.'

'But I only came to Oxford because I heard I could wear a gown!'

Graduate.

'So are you going to like fight crime?'

"Everyone who cares about you is here, Frank, because we all feel it's time you quit wearing your baseball cap backwards."

"I didn't know you had a minor."

Some New Mortarboard Styles.

Resumes

'You can't treat me like a kid anymore! I'm wearing a cape!'

To warm up touch your toes twenty times. No way! My cap will fall off!

"You've got an unconditional offer from the University of West Lincs."

Graduation.

"Ain't it great to be back on campus again?"

'Congratulations, your days of avoiding the real world are finally over.'

'Huck me.'

College store.

A teacher in mortar board and gown