Campfire Musician T-Shirts

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

Desert Island BBQ

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

'Wow, Jimmy, that's pretty good!'

Harsh Mellows.

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

'The Torch Holder'.

Roasting the Moneybox

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Professor Algarth Zag, pioneer in fire research.

'Rubbing sticks together was a great idea. After 40 minutes, I'm so warm I don't need a fire!'

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Campground Conductor

"Let’s not speak of this, Tommy – scouts’ honor?"

Flash Cuisine

"This one's really scary. It's about what's happening to my 401k."

"You were right, Louis. . . I was cold before, but now it's warm and toasty."

Creepy Camp Stories.

"I wonder if this will count for wood carving badge?"

Have food. Need toilet paper

'Is the fire included?'

'This will teach them to clean up after themselves after they camp in our woods!'

Boy makes a finger shadow on the tent.

"I'll make a deal with you! If you stop singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat, I'll help you finish your requirements!"

"First camping trip, Billy?"

Marshmallow Roast

'For the life of me I can't see how cooking over a fire, bathing under a spigot and sleeping on the ground can be fun!'

Man around campfire Title: 'Ed is a fisherman who never lies. He tells all his stories sitting up.'

My Musical Influences

'Aaaah... nuthin' like sitting out here in nature with a good campfire and a couple of ice-cold Bloodweisers.'