Campaign Management Pillows

"Peggy, can we find someone to misuse a few of these campaign funds for a run to the deli to get us some lunch?"

'A spin doctor just isn't enough any more, Senator - you need a choreographer.'

"Good boy."

"My political platform focuses on more ice cream and more frisbee chasing, with less chores and fewer baths."

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

National Everything Awareness Day

'If only every year was an election year.'

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

Political convention

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

An informed voter is a good voter

Political Candidates' Playbook Signals from the sidelines

The Russian Election.

Unfettered Corporate Campaigning.

The President Elect approved by 3 out of 4 talk show hosts!

Save the unicorn.

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.

Elections

'Why does my opponent keep lying about me?', 'Because truth is stranger than fiction?'

"Still Undecided Political Blocs"

'With these video-phones, there's just too much documentation on all my promises.'

'Son, voting isn't a rational procedure by which one strategically selects an electable candidate who will best serve your interests. Voting is an emotional response to your gut level fears!'

'I won't lower myself to the level of my opponent.'

'What's the difference? Some people call it privatizing government. Others call it super pacs buying congressmen.'

GOP exaggerating scale of immigration, inflation and crime rates

I want to be a politician when I grow up...

The following is a paid political announcement.

2020 Republican Party National Convention

"I want something in which to vote for Mrs. Luce."

'For five years you can't get a single politician to take any notice of you...and then half a dozen turn up at once!'

"Killer performance, but let's get back to the dog and pony show."

Election 2020

'Confusing, dangerous times call for confusing, dangerous leadership!'

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP