Campaign Comedy Fan Gifts

'Hey! There's nothing in the barrel but pork!'

Archival Warfare

'General, please hire large armies of foreign mercenaries to complete the works of death, desolation and tyranny.'

"Rescue...we've come to join you."

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

"All other letters have been disallowed."

"Sire, they also want dental."

'It's the consistently defininative obscure obviation coupled with absolute commitment to incomprehensible policy objectives that I find appealing.

'If social security were privatized, the administration also suggested a name change to 'Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld holdings inc.''

"The president says it's a weather balloon."

"My name's God, and I approve this message."

Of Course, we can't expect things to be as good as they have been up to now

National Liberty and Tax Codes.

Victory speech.

'There'll be a small tax hike -- I need to build a warehouse to store the budget surplus.'

Which One is Pulling Out?

Trump Tells Greta to "Chill" Even Though The Earth Isn't

Just Figureheads.

Look At The Bright Side

'Thank you but I'm a bit sensitive to ethnic food.'

Supremacist Court

"This is the most transparent administration in history..."

"There are some things medical science cannot explain...like where the hell our health care system is heading."

"Now, should we add something at the end about how wise we are and therefore nothing in here should ever be changed?"

"Anybody know how to spell anarchy?"

"Be sure to say tuned for our upcoming special report: 'Please, God, let this all be a bad dream'."

"I just got a Trump alert with my discount code off my next purchase of Trump baseball caps."

Cheesy Patriotism Elsewhere

Gang Green

Cartoonist Flashback: January 20, 2009

"Does it still count as a party if you didn't get p*ssed and throw up in the ficus plant?"

"He didn't do squat for cats."

"We were thinking, since your head speechwriter understands the issues better than you do, speaks better than you do, is smarter and better-looking than you.."

'And if you want to investigate alternative courses of treatment, you're entitled to consult your pollster.'

"How dare you not salute the goddess? You'll burn at the stake for this, damn heretic!"