Calorie Crusader T-Shirts

'I finished the whole months' diet in just five days!'

Personal Calorie Counter

"I'm doing this for you, my loves."

"I avoid the 3 'Bs' when I'm dieting - boxes, buckets and bags."

"I take it that when you went on your 'spot reduction' diet, this wasn't what you had in mind?"

'I'm trying to count calories, but I'm having trouble finding them. Do you know what they look like?'

High Calorie Area - Run For Your Life

'Lose weight now...ask me how!'

"I'd like to lose 35%of me!"

We're here at House of Java cafe at an all-too-familiar scene. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Tommy Jones, a local boy, has been caught stealing a scone. A minor offense? Not to the cafe's proprietor. He's demanding the boy be sentenced as an adult. But I'm eight! Wahhh! Add a year to the sentence for whining and crying.

Back to work...

You've Had Enough!

"That's it young man. . . No more energy drinks for you!"

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

"It started as a crusade. Now it's just a commute."

"Don't talk to me before discover coffee."

Coffee Shop and Battery Charging Station

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

"The doctor said I need more calcium, so I'm switching from dark to milk chocolate."

I am coffee and I need more coffee

It's a Dog's life

"We've got a class-action suit if I ever saw one."

DIY Butchers

"Look at this terrible mess! Let's all roll up our sleeves and clean it up!"

"Miles... I'm going abstract!"

"My holy grail is low-fat, low-cal, high-taste."

"[UNABLE TO PROCESS THIS IMAGE]"

'What's all this pet's rights stuff addressed to you?'

"The seventh cup's the charm!"

A man with a deflated bicycle stands in line at the tire inflator.

Coffee Overload: 'I'll have a low fat soy latte, no sugar, two biscotti...make that a Columbian-Kenyan bean bend...oh make it snappy, I'm in a hurry!'

"I'm bored: Let's go and swoop over cyclists' heads and scare the heck out of them..."

'Good thing we're not litigious.'