Calmness Connoisseur Pillows

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"I used to be a young crazy rebel like you you know."

The Zen of Regulation

"I don't think you'll still be that 'Zen' when I tell you someone's nicked your cheese and pickle sandwich from the fridge."

'Calm down darling... now what do you mean the tortoise has gone berserk?'

A world full of noise!

"Oh, he's an alarmist. Trim his wick and he'll be fine."

"Oh good, more time alone for quiet reflection."

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

Spontaneous Kombucha

Need an elevated state of mind too!

Meowlzebub

"She's been in shavasana for - like - a really long time...."

'I don't know. It's too busy.'

allovertheplace.com

"Rob is a functioning train wreck."

'Wait til you see what fishing does for your nerves, Alice.'

'Please join me now in a group meditation.'

"You can tell us the sound of one hand clapping here, or you can tell us downtown."

"Cat got your tongue?"

"A trough full of food, mud to roll around in: Who cares if we can't fly..."

Mr Briggs's Pleasures of Hunting - No. XII

'He's so hip he even used rock 'n roll-on deodorant.'

"You don't get a lot of work done, Jenkins, but I admire how thoroughly unstressed you are."

'I feel wired. I want to feel wireless.'

Revolving Doors Ltd. - 'He's in, out, in, out ...'

'Trouble cutting pickled onions.'

"See what I mean? People don't know how to relax anymore."

'Fred's a lot more relaxed since he began viewing life as just another spectator sport.'

'Could you put a little more effort into that 'IN' box of yours?'

Sea of Tranquillity

The appointed time

'The upside is that it will guarantee you get laid, the downside is that there's a four year wait.'

Goldfish bowl leaking into the TV screen.