Calm Driver Mugs

Traffic Sign Haiku

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

"I keep telling myself I've got to slow down."

Stop, Smell Roses (stop and smell the roses)

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Turmoil change.

'In the few remaining minutes of the lesson I can't do better than to show you how to fill an accident form.'

Relaxation Technique

'Taking the anger management class has made you uncharacteristically nice, sir.'

'Remember, son. A winner is one who can keep his head while all around him are losing theirs.'

"Mommy needs to get mad at you in a weird calm voice now."

Don't laugh. It's added three points to his scores.

Driving home for Christmas.

"This is a computer rage management class. Road rage management is next door."

"This is sheer bloody mindfulness."

"My philosophy has always been 'Don't sweat the small stuff -- it's all small stuff!'"

Roadwork ahead: Proceed cautiously and from love rather than negativity.

'We can exchange information, or, if you prefer, I can punch you in the face and forget the whole thing ever happened.'

Height barrier accident.

"I coulda been killed had this not deployed. Thank god for my passenger's side handbag!

Tai Chi

Car stickers: GONE FISHING,GONE BERSERK

"There's no charge—the grinding sound you hear when you're driving is coming from your wife's teeth."

'I pulled you over because you were driving suspiciously.'

'Better slow it down a bit.'

Drink Driving

The Modern Iconoclast...'Calm down. Things will work out.'

"I wish they had untamed-rage detectors."

'He must have crept in at night. The important thing is to stay calm.'

"I had you doing six in a five."

Radial Reflex: When your steel belted tires hit a speed bump.

'He wasn't worried about the insect on his jacket, he just brushed it off.'