Calendar Ninja Pillows

'The perfect week for my vacation. Enough work to insure I'll be missed, but not so much that I'll be overwhelmed in my post-vacation funk.'

"I think that might have been one deadline too many for Tim!"

"Ok weekend! I hope you can make up for that awful week!"

business

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

"We're restructuring - Wednesday moves to Friday, Tuesday becomes Wednesday, Monday stays where it is and Thursday and Friday will be merged with the weekend."

"It's a leap year, so an extra week's added to the calendar."

Pregnancy Test

A midwinter potluck! How lovely!! Let me check the calendar! Oh, too bad! Thwack! We already have something on that date!

'I've had tight deadlines, if that's what you mean by performing well under pressure.'

She realised it would be foolish to start a diet with third cousin Rodney's retirement party due in only 12 years.

If I move Jen's ortho to Friday, it conflicts with Sam's clarinet, but I can't move that to Monday because Tina has soccer! Ugh, how do I line this thing up? Rubik's Calendar.

"It doesn't work as a novel. But we're willing to publish it as a desk calendar."

"Follow up appointment... the doctor will be retired by then."

2020

Easter Bunny HQ. United States. If all these states can move up their primaries, why can't I move Easter ahead of Valentine's Day?!

"Have you noticed, after Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says WTF?"

"Anniversary? No? Birthday?"

"Can't do 3 p.m. — I'm scheduled for a migraine."

Two Weeks to Turkey Day. Now, Ernie, you know "Turkey Day" refers to Thanksgiving and not election day.

'Be sure to properly mark your calendars, fellow dentists...'

Welcome to another edition of "Frank and Ernest's History." it's a little-known fact that calendars and sensationalistic reporting were invented almost simultaneously! I've devised a way of organizing days and years. I see. We have a dramatic, exclusive report! I don't want to alarm everybody but your days are now numbered!

After a lifetime of chasing that elusive creature, Alvin stopped to reassess his time management skills.

"He's looking for the next big leftovers holiday."

"You think your job is hard? I have to remember which date Easter falls on each year."

'Time management begins with the assumption that time will move slow enough to be managed.'

Happy New Year!

'Can't you find another date? The evening of the 24th of December is pretty much the only night I'm not free...'

Tony 'Scareface' Montana's Wife.

Do as many study days as you can

"It's definitely Friday. I'm looking at my calendar."

How to talk to a mathematically untalented boss.

Long time no see, Darlene. That was by design. I've booked you under mad, passionate midlife crisis fling with a guy my family and friends would disapprove of. That's scheduled for March 2019 - February 2020. But if you say anything dumb between now and then that renders you unattractive, I'll have to replace you. It'd be tough to vet a sub at this late a date. I don't know the meaning of the word dumb ... tough, but not impossible.

A month of Sundays

'The 10th and the 11th are definitely out.. How about the 12th of never?'