Cage Comedian Pillows

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

"Ahhh... close enough."

Cat Reunion

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

Cat holds sign which says - Will purr for food.

"Will you stop telling me to feed the Zebras? We just ate the zebras!"

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

Litter Box Logistics Ltd.

A gift to complete the man cave.

'Oh, this will be good! He just putted into a sand trap...our litter box.'

Litter Tray Stonehenge

'Yeah, I'm a mouser.'

"I hate it..."

"That explains all the cavities."

'I'd like the tongue, please.'

"Ever wonder where all those cat videos come from?"

Fish swimming in a pint of beer.

"The party was a total surprise! Everybody jumped out and screamed 'Happy Birthday' just as I was licking my balls!"

Man asks haughty looking cat: "And how, exactly, do you qualify as a spokesman for the feline community?"

'Who did you have lick your hair?'

Early House Hunting.

"The human is back - act normal."

"I can't wait to see the look on their faces."

"I'm used to embellished resumes, but claiming you can herd cats is a bit far fetched..."

"Okay, okay - next time I'll spring the trap and you grab the cheese."

Interpretive Dental Hygiene

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

"Then it's agreed. We'll sleep on it."

"Are you gentlemen ready to eat or would you like to bat your food around awhile?"

"Can I barrow your pen?"

'It replaces all your small rocks with one convenient large one.'

"Did you just tweet?"

'I've invented copyright.'

"Sometimes I get a craving for sushi."

Extra Absorbent Kitty Litter.