Cafe Culturist Gifts

Sorry, Rudy, no way can I raise your pay to $15 an hour. Why not? 'Cause that would destroy jobs. What would you do for a job once I moved the caf

Cool coffee: An adult millennial daycare.

The partisan cafe

"And this is Ernie who makes those wonderful teapots used in cafes all over Britain...."

Come in, minion. What's up, boss? I'm writing a novel. It's a thriller about an intrepid caf

"Finches, don't look now, but there's a creepy guy staring at our beaks."

Like, Latte. So that's a vanilla almond with soy, extra foam, whipped cream, nutmeg, and caramel. Leave room for coffee?

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

"I'll have a cup of coffee, and would you mind removing that ridiculous painting and turning off the Wilco?"

Grandma's caf

Raphnrrf? Raphnrrf? Umpha? Frfee? Maamr? Pick.

'Bring me another coffee would you...'

"It's a pumpkin spice latte pie latte."

National Coffee Day

'How would you like your toast?'

Ye Old Cafe: No Coffee Today - Sore Arm!

Coffee Menu

Coffee

At This Restaurant, There Are Only Two Dishes on the Menu and They Both Suck

"I only drink decaf, otherwise I'm awake up to four hours a day."

Meanwhile at the Cafe de la Mort...

Alf's Cafe - Egg, Bacon and Tomato Plate, Catering Pack.

I've got to monitor all chatter in the cafe to prevent future pastry thefts. I don't know … What if you've got a scone thief for a neighbor, or a friend, or even a family member? Sure, today it's just a scone. But the next attack could be huge – the big one! You don't mean … Hoagie. They're trying to destroy our whole way of life.

'Sorry we don't do black decaf.'

Cafe: 'Soup of the day, Hon, is 'primordial'.'

"Whole bean or ground relentlessly to dust?"

"Let's see, now, that's cappuccino, cappuccino, cappuccino, and cappuccino—right?"

"We'll always hate Paris."

"The coffee is free, but now we rent the tables."

'Ridiculously Expensive Coffee.'

All Day Deals!

Sign reads: No lingering over a good cup of coffee.

'Dulcifying araneids didn't make them any more sapid.'