Cackle Connoisseur Pillows

Witch reads book titled 'Cackle with Confidence'.

'Boy, the fish are really biting today, aren't they, Fred?'

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

"And, when the DNA test results arrived, the woman realized her so-called 'little terrier mix' had been part German shepherd all along."

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Theatre Crowd

Canine obidience class: 'He wouldn't budge from the armchair.'

'Or we could just ask her what kind of dog it is.'

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

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'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

Two men toting a dog in a carriage by foot, while the dog sticks his head out the window.

'Try the steak tartare...it's okay.'

"I suspect your headaches may be the result of you being exposed to someone with an undiagnosed case of cabin fever."

'Just a couple more and we'll call it a day.'

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

'Save your money - he's a quack.'

"What's all this?"

'This prescription will stimulate your funny bone which will cause you to laugh. We both know that laughter is the best medicine.'

Dog Park Zoom

'I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid that's inappropriate.'

Magic coat fixing problems while walking the dog.

Crazy old clown cat lady.

A skinny dog drawn with zen brush.

'Have you tried out new Labrador Retriever Butt Scent?'

'I can see the practical side of fetching, but what's the point of rolling over?'

Not waiting for someday to look back on this and have a good laugh.

Clown's In and Out Trays.

Dog Sees Only Food

Being able to digest news quickly is a sure sign of intelligence.

Cliche Amusement Park. This park is no fun at all --- It's too much like real life! Look, that ride is called "The Emotional Roller Coaster." Over there is "Life's Ups and Downs"! ... and "The Mood Swings"! Look! The good old "Tunnel of Love"! Finally! A ride that's just a fun escape! Out of ardor. "Out of ardor" --- More real life. (Published originally Sept. 4, 2005.)

You guys were right! Screaming profanities is more satisfying than howling these days.

"Watch his feet - if he doesn't step into the throw, he's going to fake it."