Cable Enthusiast T-Shirts

"You didn't tell me Tuscany doesn't have cable."

F&E Cable Co. Sports. Movies. Special. 500 Channels. When you list the options in the cable package, call it "BBC America," not "The English Channel."

'Hey Dan, your dog' stealing our cable again.'

'Please, sir -- I need $29.95 by the end of the month or they'll cut off my cable service!'

'Help! I'm wired and I can't get up!'

The city of San Francisco switches from cable cars to satellite dish at a cost of only $79.99 a month for the first six months.

'All right! Who put my dozing-off during our last meeting on youtube?'

'I don't understand. You've wasted the whole interview going on and on about what you know... I think you'd better start telling me who you know.'

"I consider every member of our family to be like family."

"Hey, wait a minute! Isn't that our TV cable?"

A father films his family while imagining himself as a director

Exposed Intimacy Safety Vulnerability Hidden Enmity

'I've been watching TV all my life. I was born cable ready.'

"It's a long-term strategy to make them lazy and complacent first."

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

Nearly a third of the earth's life-forms have gone extinct. Cut! Stop with all the facts. This is debate club! But we're using a cable tv talk show format! What should I say? Unsupported opinions

Griller highlights never gets old

"Would you care to see a YouTube of your chicken when it was free ranging?"

Even though we have to keep our distance...

"Gee... A wide screen, high-definition TV with Stereo-Gasm Sound and over 500 channels! It's almost like having a life!"

'What did your grandmother and I do before we had 600 channels? Go ask your 12 aunts and uncles.'

"If it's any consolation, the video went viral."

"When you said something about a stream, I thought you were talking about video."

Widescreen TV.

"As a voter, I don't follow any party line, I follow a cable channel."

Minutes since the TV broke.

The scourge of the 'burbs, cable pirates board another innocent hom in their unceasing search for that one extra channel, the occasional first-run movie, or the highly-prized pay-per-view sports events..

Lovers greeting each other

'Male and Female He created them.'

"There's no way I'll ever be good at something unless there's a series of YouTube videos explaining it."

Doctor Whoo

"I haven't lost any weight, so instead of watching just one, I'm going to watch two exercise videos a day."

'Sorry Alf...the telly is bust.'

"My book report is based on the best selling video by the same name."

"The President said he hoped the bill would receive broad bipartisan support from within the Democratic Party."