Business Savants T-Shirts

'Well, well, well - so today is your 50th anniversery with the company, eh? The company my dear old Dad founded way back in the fifties - Go ahead, help yourself to some biscuits.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

The Rubber Ball Company

'Wow! I never thought it would actually WORK!'

Bullseye!

'Now I know why the strategy guide warned against entering the 5th stage. Awesome!'

'Okay, okay, be patient!'

"Maybe we should have another look at the 'business as usual' idea."

'Stay with me now, people, because in Step C, things get a bit delicate.'

"If I seem excited, Mr. Bolling, it's only because I know that I can make you a very rich man."

Lemonade Stand With Free Wi-Fi

"I love fast break business success."

'We must grasp this new opportunity'

'Miss Finch, find out what she does over there and offer her twice as much to do it over here.'

Decision Making Block

'Then it's settled. We'll make 7 million with blue handles, 5 million with red handles, 4 million with purple handles and 2 million with green handles.'

"So you're interested in medicine, public relations, business, contract negotiations and insurance law? Which one will you study in school?"

'I became successful when my dreams changed from the Cary Grants of the world to federal grants.'

Despite the economic downturn, sales are as good as ever.

The Birth of the Pyramid Marketing Sales Scam (circa 4,000 BC)

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'

'Since we downsized the board of directors profits are up 300 percent.'

'Sell South Africa!'

'Henry, I'm here to trim back your budget.'

'That's it gentlemen, we're broke. Anybody know any good jokes?'

'I say we try it.'

'Let me through - I've a bargain for a nose!'

Rudy, I've noticed your upsells have fallen drastically over the last 16 years. More and more, you just give customers what they ask for instead of pushing them to buy a larger cup, an extra cookie, or a 3-minute bathroom pass. That is unacceptable. So I've signed you up for my mandatory "How to Upsell" course and ordered you the reading material. Tuition fees will be deducted from your check. As your first lesson, I've upgraded you from the 2-week course to the 15-day one for just $50 extra. Ve

'Well, that's simplified the mission statement.'

Intelligent dog.

'Good - we're finally all on the same rampage.'

"We don't believe in miracles. We rely on them."

'From here I can monitor world stocks, or attend overseas teleconferences, unfortunately I can't get out though because the door's stuck.'

The company's marketing strategy became increasingly sophisticated.