Business Planning Session Gifts

"The margin of error is plus or minus one hundred percent."

"Looks like we found the issue."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Business meeting, CEO is dressed strangely as he asks: 'Any questions?'

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

Business of Fingerpointing Line Art

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

'Hi - I'm your company perk !'

"So let's roll up our sleeves and show that America still builds the world's greatest advertising."

"He thought this would illustrate the company hierarchy more clearly than the organizational chart."

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

"I suggest we start with the low hanging fruit."

'Ideas.com' desk with a 'come' tray and a 'gone' tray.

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

'We will not kick the can down the road... Does anyone know how to use a can opener?'

Office meeting

"I love these off-site business meetings."

"I'm so efficient I can screw up two assignments in the time it takes most people to screw up just one."