Business Philosopher Gifts

"The main, unchangeable principal that I use in life is to be pragmatic."

Your proposal is bold and innovative but we are a traditional corporation. I would prefer changes like the ones we've tried before

'I was looking for a little stronger mission statement than that.'

Growth vs Sustainability.

Executive at desk, thinking: 'I plan strategically, therefore I am.'

Who's In Charge Here?

'Sorry, I can't explain derivatives trading either.'

'Jenkins, get me all you've got on hindsight.'

'I agree, Sims, 'honesty is the best policy'. It's just not our policy.'

Ted's ability to multitask was key to his firms, success.'

'We have obligations to our stockholders, our employees and our community - Fortunately, Henderson in legal has found a loophole.'

'How come when the workers form a union, it's collective bargaining, but if we do it, it's a cartel?'

"Well, certainly his claim seems justified , but if we paid off every justified claim what kind of insurance company would we be?"

Business failed because of him.

'So how long have you been anti-business?'

"As a great woman once said, 'Don't cry. Mommy's doing the best she can.'"

Transparency and big business.

"Our greatest asset isn't financial... It's people."

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

"Well, we used to give our employees the benefit of the doubt...but we're dropping that benefit, too."

" 'Take over' is such a harsh term. We prefer corporate make over.' "

"You're saying that because of the merger I have to admit both of you?"

'I'm very worried that if we fail to introduce rigid protocols to maximise client gratification indices within acceptable costbenefit parameters to ensure enhanced margins...then we'll have missed the whole point of what Christmas is about!!!'

'He's got quite a crazy new compensation plan! An honest day's work for an honest day's pay!'

"'Quid pro quo' is a no-no, Bradbury. Around here we say 'reciprocal altruism'."

The Last Meeting.

"We've merged and formed a company called 'Two Guys and a Hat.'"

Sign: Globo Corporation: A company on a journey to find its authentic self, guided by the traditional disciplines of Western Capitalism.

Can money buy happiness?

Veterinary Management Practice Consultants

"This is Stan, He's helping us look beneath the surface of reality to transcendent truths, in order to make a buck."

"Hal, your 'live for today' philosophy just doesn't cut it at business planning meetings."

'Of course I promise what I can't deliver. That's all I can promise these days.'

The way I look at it...give a man a fish and you got a potential customer. Teach a man to fish and you lose market share.

Executive scruples