Business Model Analyst T-Shirts

'How do we make a profit selling shoddy goods? Well, we own the business next door that repairs them.'

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

"Looks like we found the issue."

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

'I'm sure that one wasn't there last week.'

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

"The Net National Product rose slightly last month."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

'Williams, we're not used to receiving such excellent ideas as these, so we'd like to tone them down a bit.'

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"Yes Sir, I'm still working on the 'ins and outs' of their proposal."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

'You could be a constant inspiration for us to come up with a plan to get a leg up on our competition...you're hired!'

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

"I'd say we were pretty much on target."

Profit

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

Foreign Markets with Big Barriers

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"I don't like getting bogged down in details. I'm more of a big-picture guy."