Business Lobbyist Gifts

Candidate Puppets

"Good boy."

"Oh, I'll be bi-partisan alright, punishing both sides of the aisle."

Kiosk in large lobby with sign above it labeled 'Empathy'.

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

"Let me assure you that my congressional delegation and I are devoting our full attention to the harmful effects of e-cigarettes. . ."

Oligarchy

Political convention

Gun laws US

'Ah, it's so precious to witness a child learn how government actually works...'

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

'Powdery stuff? Oh, that's egg substitute, from the Vegan lobby.'

A political promise is intended to be a golden egg...Which is kept in a pork barrel and after an election...Hatches into a dead duck before...it turns invisible so it can quietly vanish.

"It looks like a perfectly balanced system to me."

Benedict & Associates: Communication Strategies, Lobbying. . .

'What's the difference? Some people call it privatizing government. Others call it super pacs buying congressmen.'

'Everyone distrusts spin. . . so let's go back to old-fashioned lying.'

"It's time to get politics out of money."

'That's correct Shaun. The government is comprised of 5 branches...the executive, legislative, judicial, lobbyist and media.'

"Don't worry! He's totally changed..."

'We will not be disarmed by gun control! We will not be stripped naked and left at the mercy of a tyrannical government!'

"If we gave them press freedom they'd only want democracy too..."

COP26

The continuing adventures of Rex, Washington DC insider.

We have a dream....

"Do you take dark money?"

Automatic Congressman

Distraction.

"So from now on, the rabbi, the priest and the minister all walk into a pharmacy, O.K.?"

"With great power comes great reward."

'A more conservative version of the gun bill would also require a background check for all voters.'

"Our rule of thumb is: 'Keep it complicated' - so no one will understand how we choose a candidate."