Business Literature Gifts

"We are prepared to offer you a compensation package that includes a significant portion of the Western Hemisphere."

'I just wish, he had been more direct...

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

"To address this mistake we must be professional and use root-cause analysis. I'll start by saying it's not my fault...."

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

'When will I be old enough to have my own people?'

The little engine that could delegate.

'I've collected my memos into one reasonably priced gift book.'

"Pendleton, as of noon today your services will no longer be required. Meanwhile, keep up the good work."

"The itsy-bitsy spider went up the corporate ladder. And he didn't care how many lives he ruined along the way. I know, this isn't the book Simon & Schuster wants. But it's the damn truth."

"We had to lay off most of the staff to pay for the recruitment and training of new staff to replace the staff we laid off."

"I'll tell you what I'm looking for! I'm looking for a yes man, Jenson. Do you think you could fit that bill?"

"So we all agree to reduce our company motto to 'It was the least we could do'?"

New must reading for the rising executive: '7 Habits of Highly Obsequious People.'

'Here's our business editor to talk s**t to us for five minutes'

'So this is the company's new mission statement.'

"They got me for pillaging. How about you?"

Business man reading 'Thinking Outside the Chair'

"We're looking for people to fire."

'On the agenda for this meeting is sick leave...'

'You deserve a bonus, but of course we can't give you one. Instead, we offer a pat on the back and five atta boys.'

"On the plus side, you're on the cover of all the major business publications."

'It's good, but it's not good-to-go.'

NOW HIRING SECRETARY, 'Oh, what the heck -- typing is overrated anyway.'

"Yay, we have an agenda for today's meeting!"

Rat Race Resources.

"My name is Bob and I'm looking for a 'Yesirree' man."

'Fortunately I'm a big guy.'

A shark is reading a book entitled 'Swimming with the lawyers'.

'The new role will involve some EXTRA responsibilities...of course you'll appreciate that there won't be any extra funding...It's a role for which you are uniquely qualified!'

'We've got to stop him watching Robert Peston.'

Paradigm shifters company.

"Looks like somebody's compensating."

My, my, we're justs a little overprotective of our propriety knowledge, aren't we?

'No wonder the company is in trouble!'