Business Jetsetters T-Shirts

"New York are at Lunch, Munich are at Coffee and Tokyo are at Lunch."

Business-Class.

"Hawaii, where are you folks going?"

"Think we'll still make happy hour?"

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

'If we have only fractional ownership, it's not a private jet anymore, is it?'

A private jet takes off

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

'Bye dear! I'll have another nice reindeer steak ready for you when you get back.'

Airport Bored Rooms

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

'It has all the comfort of a regular jet, but it's invisible to shareholders.'

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

'But, I have only one item of hand-luggage... You can't charge me extra...'

Italy in Three Days."We're doing Assisi tomorrow. Myra wants to shop red leather jeans."

"Hell: The Airport"

Dog on a plane.

"Could you pass me up? I'm in row one."

"We are now in 'The Galley,' where flight attendants scavenge for food, hoard magazines, hide from passengers and over share details of their personal lives."

"I know it's only our second date, and stop me if I'm moving too fast, but, would you non-rev with me?"

Airline Mergers.

'I don't need to be fluent in French. I'm fluent in money.'

"Today's flight is overbooked. Is there someone who would accept a free travel voucher in return for teaching us how to correctly book a flight?"

'At least we're still in first class.'

'Round-the-world ticket please!' - 'One way?'

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, and this is your captain siiinnngiiinnng."

"Have you decided where to travel?"

"What do you mean, 'Who's el ca-pi-tán to Albuquerque'?"

Heathrow New Variants Arrivals Lounge

"The idiots don't realise that flying in a private jet is meant to be IRONIC!"

Bumblebee Flights...Buzz Europe, Buaa USA, Buss the world: 'We just fly willy-nilly all over the dang place!'