International Jet-setter T-Shirts

"Which way to departures?"

Airlines

"Business doesn't take a summer vacation."

"First class, or with children?"

Man packing suitcase with French vocabulary

'Are we there yet?'

"If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room!"

Travelling

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

"This seat with extra legroom is great."

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

Private Jet

'He must be going economy!'

'I'm sorry. I probably should have talked to to you before I took down our wedding photo and put up a picture of my jet.'

'And don't be afraid to ask for directions.'

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

"These shades are GREAT-I dreamt I was in Tahiti!"

Getting out of baggage fees is tricky, another sweater or two and I'd be charged for an extra seat.

"'Mr. Evans,' she said to me with that adorable smile, 'I think you're the nicest boy in the entire old-boy network.'"

Two airplanes

'I thought we'd never break through those clouds!'

'It has all the comfort of a regular jet, but it's invisible to shareholders.'

Air travel isn't what it used to be.

"Hell: The Airport"

Jet flies by. 'And of course it's handy for the airport.'

'Will that be coach?'

"So far, my luggage has had a more exciting vacation than I have!"

"We are now boarding priority travellers. Please be ready to present an air of entitlement."

Dog on a plane.

'Business or pleasure?'

Travel Agency: Pacific time cures all ills.

Flights and Coronavirus

Business-Class.