Burger Connoisseur Gifts

Elvis going to the 'House of 1/4 pounders near the 'House of gingerbread'

"I can tell you're enjoying your alternative-meat burger. Look at the beet juice running down your chin!"

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

Burger Queen: The Patriarchy is Dead.

Best Before 5th Pint.

"Two burgers, two fries, two martinis—and we'll have those to go."

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"Must everything with you be a landmark decision?"

"They always throw us stale bread, so I've decided to bake my own, fresh break..."

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

"Scotch and water musick."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

"Shower beers? Aisle eight."

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

Nutrition-Free Diet

4 Reasons People Love Oktoberfest

'A HAMBURGER?.. really?.. I took you for the WEENIE type!'

'A quick pint or a quiet drink?'

"Fetch me another Sculpin IPA."

'A Quarter-Tonner, please.'

A boy who loves cows/burgers

"What'll ya have?"

'Malty tasking.'

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!