Burger Aficionados Gifts

'Business is getting better but it's still necessary to cut back a bit on the festive celebrations.'

'Never, Ever...expect a fast food restaurant to be fast.'

'Do you want flies with that?'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

'Don't order the Super Duper Jumbo Special.'

Burger Queen: The Patriarchy is Dead.

"Two burgers, two fries, two martinis—and we'll have those to go."

"Five hamburgers with buns, three hamburgers without buns and two buns, without hamburgers."

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"Okay - who wants theirs well done?"

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

Nutrition-Free Diet

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

'A Quarter-Tonner, please.'

"Beer? I see you taught Roscoe to fetch?"

A boy who loves cows/burgers

The proper term for our special promotion is Triple Cheeseburger with a Gazillion fries...not the triple bypass special!

'A HAMBURGER?.. really?.. I took you for the WEENIE type!'

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

Sisyphus Sawyer

'As a romantic guy, nature always makes me thoughtful. Right now, I think about fast-food restaurant stocks.'

The mission: Impossible burger.

'I am the ghost of Christmas future...with fries!'

Calorie averaging...With the oven-fresh trip-el burger, you get one French fry.

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."