Bureaucracy Bickerer Gifts

'I need my lifestyle validated.'

'Ok, I'm in a paperwork mood. Let 'er rip.'

He may have a PH.D in elementary particle physics, but he's having an awful lot of trouble with the application form.

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

The Buck Never Stops.

Deskboxes: 'LATE' and 'NEVER'.

Bureaucracy gone mad!

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

Doctor surrounded by notes.

Dictator, Interrupted

'It's a government funded study to find out how many wrongs make a right.'

NHS targets.

'It's not so much the distance to your proposed mini-mall site, but that I'm not as familiar with your galaxy's zoning laws as I'd like to be.'

'Forget it lads. We've been refused planning permission for this one!'

"What's this? Now we have to hunt, gather and collate?"

How many workers does it take to put up a Christmas decoration?

GPs could be forced to switch IT systems onto new NHS digital contract

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

'In... out... in... out... in... out... in...?!'

IN, OUT, NOT WORTH THE EFFORT.

"I'll need to see your responsible service of alcohol certificate."

'There were some cost overruns on the project that we need to discuss.'

"This is to apologise for the delay in internal mail that you wrote to us about in 1997"

I filed my tax return electronically, to speed things up. Sure enough, I got audited in record time.

"I think she's having a Spontaneous Paperwork Induced Collapse."

'All these stupid forms! -- You self-employed guys make me sick!'

The mazes were too easy, so now they have me running through bureaucracies and looking for grants. (Originally published on 2007-10-18).

"Someday my grant will come."

Bureau of Red Tape

Federal Center for the Study of your Tax Return.

"Ambitions... to finish on the winning side for a change."

'They want to close our lab. What's that all about?'

"In principle we're happy with the trust idea...as long as it's properly monitored and regulated!"

'When I die, please cremate me and send my ashes to the tax office. . .Write on the envelope, 'Now, you have everything.''

Too early to begin working on/Too late to do anything about.