Bureaucracy Banter Lover Gifts

So I said to them - what do you want, the shirt off my back?

"Excuse me, sir. Do you have a permit to fish there?"

'I don't care if it's a little storage room for King Tut, you still need a building permit and contractor's license.'

"Ticket and passport, please."

"So from the top. If they need urgent help it's form AC/765c, criticl interventions are CV/U657's and..."

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

"Ah, you'll be wanting our red tape department, third door on the left!"

Wolf Reintroduction.

Liberties: civil and uncivil.

"I'll need to see your responsible service of alcohol certificate."

'The dept. of agriculture says yes, the environmental protection agency says maybe, and the food and drug administration says no.'

Director: US Space Research.

'We're downsizing the Pentagon into a triangle.'

Department of Sanitation: In Bin and Out Bin.

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single travel requisition."

'On behalf of our cabin crew who have voted in favour of strike action over Christmas. . . kindly fill out this form. Please send us your questions and comments about how the strike has effected your plans, ruined your holiday. . .'

Washington Monuments

"Y formerly Department of Government Efficiency"

Congratulations on winning the Inland Revenue Fiction Award.

'The next disciplinary committee might not be so lenient.'

Police officer giving ticket to paramedics.

'You like it? I'm getting a government grant for Phase 2.'

"We have all kinds of Regulatory Guidelines floating around."

Man at desk in 'Space research'. His in and out boxes are labelled 'inner' and 'outer'.

"Now that we can talk, we have to have meetings."

"I'd like to buy your subscription list to check for changes of address."

"Congratulations Dave, after a through vetting process, we've selected you for the promotion."

'I'm afraid you're going to have to stay with us for a thousand years, but your sins are tax-deductible.'

10/03/17 14:03

"The war's been cancelled. It would raise insurance rates."

'Teaching, reading, writing, and arithmetic sounds like a good idea. Let me run it by an educational focus group.'

Man in office notices file cabinet placed in front of the door to the Planning Department.

Frankenstein "Damn it! Not another ethic origin questionaire"

"We only do gentle embellishment here. Go down the hall and turn right for the division of bald-faced lies."

'Let's vote on the proposed merger with the IRS...'