Building Superintendent Gifts

"...there's honey all over the walls, a weird buzzing noise 24 hours a day and some weird broad at the end of the hall thinks she's the queen!"

"Does the co-op board have any idea when the elevators will be replaced?"

A man sees a leak in his ceiling and drills a hole in the floor under leak to by pass his apartment.

"Now this apartment will be vacant October 1st - "

Confused Plumber

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"Young Frankenstein"

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"Yes, I know they fit, it's just not what I pictured for a three car garage!"

"As I understand it, after this scaffolding comes down the city will be done."

"Measure twice, cut once...and curse three times!"

Another All Steel Home Built By Wit Construction.

Building Sandcastles.

'The housing market may be flat, but pillow-fort construction is blooming!'

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

Do it yourself books.

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

"Steady. This is going to be so sweet."

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Lego Haircut

There is nothing more satisfying that peeling the film off a brand new building.

'I like it but frankly, I had something more substantial in mind.'

"I hoped you'd change your hobby when you became a father"

"You can build it with me, but you can't wreck it with me."

'I don't like the sound of the engine.'

"Apparently, when the tide came in, a lot of castles went bust."

"First snowman?"

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

"He says he wants to see the actual brick he donated."

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

'Mum! Come and see the coffee-table I've made with my new tool-set!'

Baby being fed using a lego construction.

Sick Building Syndrome

"Hey, I just consider myself very fortunate to be getting paid for something I'd be doing anyway."