Building Buffs T-Shirts

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

Earthquake Research Centre

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

'When you're right, you're right. When you're wrong, you're fired.'

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

Caution: Construction workers standing around and drinking coffee.

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

You're right, it's the house next door that gets the new window.

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

Welcome to Elmville "Home of the world's biggest pothole." The mayor sure knows how to make the best of a bad situation!

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

'The buildings are merging.'

"Could I have a Tommy Tippee cup for my friend's beer, as he's been using a concrete breaker all day."

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

'The client loves your work. Cut everything except for their logo.'

'The owners are a bunch of clowns.'

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'

How can you be so sure this is Farmer Phillip's Farm?

The Mayor Alonzo Q. Furdweiller Pothole. Looks like the mayor and the city council are bickering again.

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

They Always Say That

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

'We thought you'd like music during your building inspection.'

"Looks like a tragic accident Chief. Although how he could trip and fall under a road roller beats me."

Silver Sufferer - husband looking at steam trains on the internet, wife bored in background

"Don't be ridiculous. If the wheels were round, you'd never be able to stop."

"Did you have any problems at the design stage?"

Newton discovers surrealism

Sharon's more of a do-it-yourselfer.

How much for a blueberry scone? $3.25. I'll give you $1.20. Huh? $1.40. $1.45. It's not negotiable. Shrewd. $1.65. $2.00. $2.10. $2.25, but I want free shipping! Ebay addicts. $3 for your sandwich. $6.

"What's it like, working with your hands?"

Personnel. You did high-tech work in this railroad job? It was a part-time position --- I was a semi-conductor.