Building A New Conservatory Pillows

'I think Fred's taken the idea of having a conservatory a little too far!'

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

Music Student

Woodworms at a sculpture gallery.

Fish eating smaller fish in a tank.

'Anti-Graffito' worker about to erase hieroglyphics.

'You've been rearranging the furniture again, haven't you?'

'Poor thing. He got left out in the acid rain.'

Alderman shocked at a proposal to pull down Temple Bar

"... No, when I say, 'you must let go of the past' I mean you must return that vase to the museum you took it from."

Michelangelo's David is cleaned every two months.

"Jack! Would it kill you to just once try evolving?!"

DIY Disaster.

'We need to update our gravel, install a fake treasure chest, and get one of those lifelike scuba divers. Apparently, it's all about curb appeal.'

"Is there anything sadder than an underfunded wax museum?"

Musician rushing to the conservatory.

Planeterrium.

'I can't take anymore, Gladys - I'm asking for a transfer to pottery !'

Father Goldfish: 'One day Son, this will all be yours.'

To the Aquarium

Time Smoking a Picture.

They locked eyes. The tension between them – deliberate. All of which made the crows very uncomfortable.

'We find this miniature rock band helps the illusion of a live band experience.'

"These things work better if you don't explain the plot."

Kamikaze fish. $3.95 each.

"Honey! I think the angelfish have outgrown the neon tetras!"

Goldfish

'What a useless eyesore!'

'It better be good - we only eat once a month.'

"Lead paint - they're being recalled."

It's important that you set boundaries for your new pet.

'I wouldn't read that book, dear...it's only there to impress visitors.'

"Honey, it was really sweet of you to invite the Wilsons over, but didn't it occur to you that they might not be saltwater fish?"

'Henry would dearly love a conservatory!'