Buggy Whip Maker Pillows

"I feel like my job in the fossil fuel industry is going the way of the telegraph operator, the pony express rider and the buggy whip maker..."

'Rollin', rollin', rollin',...keep them dogies rollin'...'

"He is throwing another of his 'hissy fits' again!"

'The girls must be feeling better...'

'No, this metal stress can't be fixed with liberal doses of antidepressants.'

Oh no ... Outsourcing

'How am I going to get all this back in the tube?'

"She got a brand new whip for her birthday."

Wino Appreciation Group

Egg Buggy

"I don't get it either, but my mom keeps telling me to hang up the phone, so I do it to make her happy."

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

The Gong

'Ah, here's your problem - all this spaghetti is real spaghetti.'

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

Cowboy Trump

"Honey, your head's through the armhole again."

Girl asking her little cousin what he would like for his birthday

Children's Self-Help Books. How to Look for a Lost Toy Without Moving a Muscle. It IS Possible to Make a More Annoying Sound! Tying the Impossible Knot. Mom! MOM! Moooooom!

What next?!

The invisible man makes a pancake

'Tsk - he will keep throwing things out of the buggy.'

'Let's go and lean against one of the vibrators.'

Hay fever hotline.

Wait, you took how many steps?

Squeaker Trophies

'Whipped cream?'

'I've been generating my own electricity for years.'

I brake for worms

"Fart (Pass it on)."

'It's time that ball-kicking cheater got his. Tell mommy that daddy loves her, Ritchie... Here I go...'

The Flea Circus.

"At some point the process went wrong."

'I'm afraid your 'giggle-pin's' gone on your 'laugh-shaft'!'

"I dunno... It's just not the same without snow."