Buffet Conquerors Pillows

"Look, I'd like to help, but I've just got too much on my plate right now."

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

Gramma's Tators & Gravy...All You Can Eat!

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Do you know I fought an hour with that salmon you're eating."

“Our numbers grow greater and greater. Soon the era of the spices will be at hand”

There! I've made my year's supply of zucchini bread! That's kind of a lot. How can you store them all? It's no problem. I just throw out last year's supply.

Am Awful Crammer.

Well, what did you expect on the mother ship?

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

"You know, statistically speaking, at least one of these gingerbread men is gay."

"The night raid on the kitchen bench was a disaster sir! The owner woke up, came downstairs for a glass of water and attacked us!"

'Your first cruise then, mate?'

" 'Unlimited salad bar' sounded better on the menu."

A woman's work is never done!

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

Excess Baggage: Take lots of photos on your cruise so you can show folks what you looked like before you gained those 20 pounds.

A day in the life of a dish sink

The sword in the all-natural impossible-to-stir peanut butter.

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

Thanksgiving: The holiday where aluminum foil is king!

"I'm not all you can eat? But I brought my special plate!"

"Are we pessimists and our stomachs are half empty or optimists and our stomachs are half full?"

The Colonel at home.

Tsunami in the cooking pot.

"Touch that and you're a dead man."

'I don't want this romantic day to end either, Darla, but I keep worrying I might miss tonight's midnight buffet!'

'All the rice you can eat... with one chopstick.'

'It was the last straw when she threw her lumpy gravy over me!'

"Where's a fairy godmother when you need one?"

All You Can Eat

"I'm making Thanksgiving dinner this year. Do you have Turkey Helper?"