Budget Virtuoso Pillows

"Well here's a thing Babs - the month's run out before the end of the money."

Balancing two espresso martinis

An informed voter is a good voter

"I just..."

'I thought that 'remote gizmo' was just for manoeuvring the caravan down the drive!'

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

'Apparently it's part of the evolutionary process!'

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

I know I'm not qualified for the job, but watch my incredible video resume anyway. It got an Honorable Mention at Cannes!

"My name is Leonard, and I'll be your auto mechanic for today."

'Aha! I think I figured out the headache problem, one of these things is pointed the other way. This would explain the double vision.'

'I'm afraid the motion has been carried and you lost.'

"Turn down the bass."

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

'Crikey, you've got to have good eye-sight to look through those glasses, haven't you?'

"By the way, about your presentation...Management has made a surprise visit."

"Now, how many of you liked the viola player best?"

"You've got to give Hunter top marks for presentation."

"The secret of time management? Never take anyone off hold."

'Yo, Danny! The pitcher's complaining about the crowd noise. Turn it down!'

"… and the last item on the pre-nuptial aggreement is, … he wants final cut on all home videos."

Exercise Car.

Videogame Employment Agency.

Piggy bank writing an article on 'How to save Money?'

Two workers chatting by vending machine: 'Who are you working on at the moment?'

'I say, it really shows off your astigmatism to its greatest advantage, doesn't it?'

'He's my 'greed coach'.'

Oculist.

'It's simple. First we look at the upside. Then we look at the downside. Then we look at the upside-down side.'

"Wrong, wrong, wrong and wrong. I'd like you to see another specialist. His office is closer to the eye chart."

'Now cover the other eye & read the same line.'