Budget Eater Gifts

Rene's Cafe: Eat dirt cheap.

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

Credit Crunch Corn Flakes.

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

'I knew we should have brought your Marigolds, dear!'

'Waiter, you seem to have mixed my bill up with somebody who wants to buy this restaurant.'

AS about Today's Specials' - 'Whatever didn't sell yesterday.'

'Would you care for a drink while your food is being defrosted?'

"It would be better with a protein, but add-ons are so expensive."

"Might I recommend one of our salads? They come with three of your companion's fries."

"What wine goes well with £5.52p?"

'Don't overdo the mustard, sir -- we're trying to control costs around here.'

"The crab Florentine is excellent, but the rack of lamb has limited downside risk.''

We'll pass on the entrees...

Deep in the heart of the one-star restaurant district...'Guess what you're eating buffet!'

"It's a new way to stretch leftovers. Saw it in Homeopathy Now."

'We're having leftovers again. Don't worry, I shaved off all the fuzzy parts. I'm going to knit you a sweater.'

Food Prices

"We use the cheapest ingredients and pass the savings on to you."

Dad she's fallen into the cereal again!

Camper special! PORK 'N' BEANS...50 gallons...only $49.99...Limit: 3 per customer.

'The lower-priced items contain genetically-modified foods not yet approved for human use.'

Pizza By The Slice

'What's affordable tonight?'

'Letting you pick up the check will help you stay on your diet.'

"It's become so expensive, that if I want sushi, I have to catch my own!"

'It's half as good as our $10 special.'

'I like my wine the way I like my prescriptions - generic.'

Thrift: Sew your mouth shut before going to a restaurant.

'Sorry about dinner, honey...ever since your dad was laid off work we've been trying to figure out new ways to make dinner.'

Please give! Buying organic food doesn't come cheap.

"I've discovered a great way to diet...I just look at the price of food and I lose my appetite!"