Budget Conspiracy Theorist Gifts

NHS notice - This is a bring your own bed hospital

The Anti-Agent

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

Santa, Alien, Easter Bunny and Sasquatch plan the perfect caper.

The Circular Logic of Fascism

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

"Walt Disney on ice."

"My latest sighting turned out to be just another weather balloon."

New Road Signs to Watch For:

Alien Assumption

Crony Capitalism (Always Follow the Money Trail)

The Da Vinci Cod

"Check the setting. I'm sure the CIA isn't hacking into our appliances just to burn your toast."

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

"No, Mother, I don't think Julian Assange is going to leak your recipe for fruitcake."

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'Sorry guys... budget cuts !'

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

Gremlins 47

'To paraphrase Franklin Delano Roosevelt: The only thing we have to fear is the NSA, FBI, CIA, DEA, IRS, DIA, EPA, FTC, FCC...'

"Defense budget... Do you have any idea how much catnip $700 billion would buy?"

'The scariest story I know is escalating health care costs.'

An alien tries to hitch a lift at the side of the road

'Oh my!...Corn circles, Roswell, aliens, pyramids - there's a connection!...'

"I remember driving to Roswell and then it goes blank."

'Of course I'm paranoid and delusional, dummy! -- I was abducted by aliens, for crying out loud!'

'Eat the grass in perfect circles. It drives them crazy.'

The Russians Are Coming...Maybe

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

What can I get you? An explanation for why we haven't gone back to the moon. Would you like the rational explanation or the Youtube explanation? Rational would be lovely, please. Ok. We never went back to the moon because there was no reason to. The whole point of Apollo was to reassure the free world that we could beat the Soviet Union. Mission accomplished. Oh ... that's it? Well, that's rather bland. Could I exchange that for the Youtube explanation? The lizard-men who live on the film set wh

The evidence destroyed

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