Bright Side Believers Pillows

'I feel guilty, I left my shopping cart by my car today, instead of putting it in the cart corral, , , At least when we die, we'll go to the same place,'

"Can you hypnotise me into being in shape?"

'Reach up and fold down into Uttanasa.' - 'Notice how you feel both physically and spiritually.' - 'Physically, I feel that my toenails are a bit too long.' - 'Hmmm... okay, what about spiritually?'

She doesn't like my song? All the kids LOVED it at Day Care!

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

'Your future looks charming.'

"Take. Your. Time!"

'No, your stock didn't split. The fact it's worth half of what it was yesterday is just an amazing coincidence.'

"And if Ooh, Eeh, Ooh Ah Ah doesn't work, we'll try Walla Walla Bing Bang."

'I think the meeting went reasonably well until he threatened to call security.'

Give Thanks.

'He hasn't been able to speak for a week, conversely my blood pressure is nothing short of a miracle.'

"How can Santa eat all those cookies and drink all that milk in one night? Well, like everything else when it comes to Santa, it's magic. . ."

Always look on the bright side.

"That was good, but less tongue next time."

"How do those feel? Click them together a few times."

'Yes, Judy...looks like we're putting a good face on the impending bad weather.'

"If you never date a prediction it can't be proved wrong."

'No, we wouldn't want to ask God's blessing on something evil, but carrots aren't evil.'

Feelings towards radios #8 People worshipping a radio.

Jesus the comedian.

"That's a coincidence. I'm a Princess who was turned into a frog by a wicked witch. Do you think it would work if I kissed you?"

"I told you we should have given them treats!"

"Relax - we're blessings in disguise."

Balloons

Colin was always looking for new ways to communicate complex financial products.

"The nice thing about being a fruit fly is you only have to listen to one news cycle."

'On the bright side I can finally understand what your saying.'

At least you didn't marry him.

"One nice thing about winter...makes the masks feel good!"

'I wish I had my money back...'

'All I did was tell him his bonds were backed by the full faith and credit of the U.S. government.'

"Or, it could be a huge advantage."