Brew Ritualist T-Shirts

"Oh, I hate the taste. It's the ritual I adore."

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"Dad, can we have a bedtime narrative?"

"Incredible! Once again, you've made the perfect piece of toast."

"Great coffee, Carole."

'As part of our alternative budget management strategy we've got Tim on 'Hail Marys' in here and Geoff sacrificing a goat to Woden next door!'

'It has to breathe for exactly 22 minutes; then I can pour you a glass - right after the sacrifice.'

Rugby Players and Supporters Essential Supplies

"Lemme guess: You're struggling with the French press again."

"I'm treating you like a living deity for one day."

"You doomscroll, I make coffee, and together we forge bravely into each new day."

Daily Grind Coffee Cup

"It's pumpin spice latte season - I feel it in the air."

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

Diner. Breakfast Specials. I'm a type "C" personality. Until I have my morning coffee I have no personality at all.

"What better way to start your day than to eat and pray before we play!"

Man looking at his shower-bath on a cold morning

The Wackoman (Heat it).

'Didn't you know that I read the comics every morning before I take the newspaper to Master?'

"Are you regular?" "Every morning at 6AM." "That's good." "But I don't wake up until 7."

"Take me to your barista."

'I've learned that adding water to coffee only weakens the effect.'

"If I ask you something, will you promise not to get mad?"

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

'How long has what been going on?'

'Nothing like a cup o' Joe before you mow.'

Do you kneel to pray in church? No, we stand up for our rites.

"Virgin?! My bad. . . I thought you asked for a vegan."

"I'm prescribing your husband a double dose of malt whiskey, to be taken twice every evening."

Eye Opener

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Ganges

Three witches standing around a carafe in a coffee machine, waiting for it to fill

Grinds