Breath-holding Champion Gifts

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Holding your breath for any length of time is harder than you think!

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

"Who called this meeting again?"

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

'I can't figure out why I keep getting wind knots.'

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

Anger Management: Breathe in and Breathe out.

"I'm keeping 'up' distance... there's a reason they are called DROPlets."

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

'C'mon Ben, there's no need to count them out!'

A fisherman carries a rainbow trout.

"Breathe in...now breathe out. Excellent! Just remember to keep doing that for the next few years and you'll be fine."

'Now I understand why people want to give them up.'

A Message from Your Fishing Buddies.

"Hey buddy! Come over here and draw me something about 'Freedom of Speech!'"

Thanks to hypnosis, he quit smoking cold-turkey. Everyone seemed real supportive until he came strutting into work, half-naked, gobbling incoherently.

Angie Goff

"Sure, it's an artificial fish. I caught it with artificial bait."

"They were all in undisclosed locations."

'Wow, breathing! What a concept.'

Sign at Hospital: 'Road to Recovery ... Under Construction'

Rex grits his teeth, puts on his big boy pantaloons and gears up for the day ahead.

"To think just a few weeks ago he was a lazy bum and now he's saving the world!"

"Have you been tested?"

'Mr Chairman, it's nearly midnight. Can we move on to item two?'

"Did you forget to gargle dear? Your breath is atocious."

Will the last person to quit smoking please empty the ashtray!

Isolation Olympics

Eggs playing 'Scramble'.

"Terrible, I couldn't fall asleep no matter how hard I tried."

Failed Suicide

'And that's what catch-and-release is all about, son...'

'OK, one quick picture... but then I should probably get him to a hospital.'

'Wow, a new personal best: You held your breath for 10mn 46s!'