Breakthrough Buff Pillows

'Well, now that you've found a cure, all our funding will be sent to another division.'

"Although your discovery is very important, the consensus is that your article about it lacked suspense, and was completely devoid of humor."

"I found a cure for the humongous cold, the extreme cold and the mother of all colds. Why not the common cold?"

'Another day. . . another half dozen medical breakthroughs for us to comprehend. . .'

Skiing.

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"Walk, hell- I gotta dance."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

'Typical man - why can't he just ask for directions?'

"Never mind the porridge, someone's stolen my woodland mushroom collection."

Research and Development: 'We've finally done it. An actual cell phone!'

'Humans do it, why couldn't we? Instead of chasing food, we could breed it: It's all explained in my report...'

'I'll have toast and he'll have a complete dog's breakfast.'

"Frank, I want you to try antidepressants."

Fish flipping flapjack in pan. Title: 'Ed was glad he'd caught a panfish.'

Gullib-Os

"Very few people are aware that the 'New York Times' Sunday crossword puzzle is contagious."

'Every time we clear all the snow another blizzard hits. We're cursed men Frank. Cursed!'

'Gee, where are all the crowds this year?'

Hysterically laughing monster.

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

Trawling for Fish.

The breakup

"OK, hands up who’s vegan... lactose intolerant... peanut allergies..."

Two gamers play in a game arcade near a machine titled; 'Get a life'.

'Okay darlin' if you need more whipped cream just hit the red button.'

Friends often dropped by and subjected Sir Isaac to a little good-natured ridicule.

'How do you want your eggs, too hard or too soft?'

'The wife says if I don't give up snooker, she's leaving me. . .I'm going to miss her.'

Greatly enlarged view of newly discovered particle.

Credit Crunch: Breakfast for Losers.

Bagel problems.

"The bagel’s from a previous marriage."