Bravado Gifts

"My strength is the strength of ten because I'm fourteen."

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

"If it were painful, could I do this?"

Thank you, Essential Workers

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

'I don't trust him - he's got beady eyes.'

Excess Baggage: You send emails from exotic places just to make your friends jealous.

'All I want for Christmas is my old shape back again.'

"How are we on bread?"

'It's a screaming ladies part.'

William Wallace.

'You can bring Fury in now, Mrs. Caslick.'

"Who are you looking at? Want to kick off, do you?"

Joe's Bar: Your money back if you think you're man enough!

Trumpets Green

'My Father can beat up your Father!'

'The time to really worry is when credit's not even crunchy!'

'What's the point of having a luxury car if you put it in the garage at night?'

'This should come out just right.'

(Carl's Sports Bar) - 'Hockey Sucks!!' - Although Earl had made good on his dare, it would be weeks before he could eat solid food again.

'You've been overfeeding the budgie again, dear.'

"He won't bite, but he carries with him a large repository of judgements."

"I'm gay! I'm gay!"

Fish with a hook tells a good tale.

'You've got to admire them. Most of them actually have children of their own.'

"Plus cute. Did I mention extremely cute, for a fusion chef?"

Headless chicken: "Is that all you got?"

'I think of my 'bald-patch' as a solar panel for a sex-machine!'

Woman bragging about her big fish, husband with small fish.

'Show-off.'

"Stop catching the bullets!"

'I won the garlic eating competition.'

'Now that's confidence!'

"Is it safe to come out of the basement and act like a bad-ass again?!"