Brand Strategist Pillows

"I'm spending more time promoting myself than I am being myself."

"I believe it took a team of twenty five, working six months at a cost of �250, 000 to come up with that."

Peace on Earth

Turning 'Raw Hype' Into 'Pure Hype'

Focus group

'We're losing the mid-morning market. Let's put a hamburger in a glazed donut and call it brunch.'

"We have to decide between 'contains miracle ZE-49' or 'guaranteed free of harmful ZE-49'."

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"When we changed the company name, the stocks went through the roof!"

'They've rebranded the reference library.'

'Let me see your portfolio of stolen ideas.'

"I think you should change the company name, Mr Swill"

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

Natural Aisle Product Name Generator

"No name? No design? No Colour?" "...And no tobacco...just pure image!"

'If we're not Abercrombie, and we're not Gap, then who are we - Stella McCartney?'

"Bob, it's about your branding."

'It says 'An honest product from an honest company...100% artificial''.

"It's not a crisis. It's an incomplete success."

"Looks like the pink rebranding campaign didn't work."

"It's our new brand strategy."

"I can't wait to see our new ad campaign. Wait, don't tell me...it's NEW and IMPROVED!"

Your Ad Here

'It's not really rsutling, it's rebranding."

"Dwayne is very important to us. He knows exactly when a trend will become a craze."

"Marketing is child's play."

"I think it's the company logo."

"Remember, you're selling home appliances, so look more ... dishwashery."

Facebook facing advertising mutiny over hate speech and racist messages on its platform

"Right, I think I'll call it fire, now I just need to work out how to monetise it

Very smart mousetraps & brands

His master's voice

"At this point, the product smiles and says, 'Good day, Mr. Froggie'."

"Our market research predicts this product mascot will be irresistible to both men and women..."

"I've decided to redefine as a GREAT artist."