Brainy Prints

"There's gotta be something profound in here...."

"Is it that bad?"

"What do you want to talk about first...the kleptomania or the hoarding?"

'They took my Science Fair Award away. They said I ate too much fish, which is brainfood. So, it was like I was on mental steroids.'

Man embarrassed by a schoolboy's superior knowledge of Greek

"My therapist plays with my brain."

Dog training

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

Child lifting alphabet blocks.

Nervous Student

'It's a sad case -- amnesia AND identity theft.'

'I ink, therefore I am....', IF DESCARTES HAD BEEN A CARTOONIST

Lost and Profound.

"Don't worry they're all part of my team."

Turning off the thinking lightbulb at home time.

(I'm afraid someone is going to expose me as a phony, a fraud, … A complete charlatan.) (Uh, oh! He's on to me!)

"Let's see if I understand: your brain can't be upgraded with additional memory, and to make matters even worse, untold thousands of those brain cells die each day?"

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

Doctor with pump: 'Hold on a second while I inflate his ego.'

"So you're saying if I wasn't so smart, I'd have more friends?"

Cutting down the Brain

Brain Exercise Video: "Okay, think...and stop...and think, and stop! Stay with me now! Think harder! Feel that burn!"

Stock Market Psychology: 'Buy with the leftside of your brain, sell with the rightside!'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'But when you decided to go into psychology didn't you REALIZE that you'd be ‘surrounded by idiots'?'

Psychology: Module 1 . . . . Attention span.

'You're in denial.'

'I'm going to refer you to Dr. Keinsorge -- he actually enjoys this sort of thing.'

"Why do you have to be so smart? You'd be more popular if you acted normal."

"So, what makes you think I'm a therapist?"

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Annual Amnesia Convention

Miss America IQ pageant.

They're brothers. One is very intelligent. The other is a baseball pitcher who constantly cheats. They both have a lot on the ball!

In the physiology depat. Professor Rickman was known as being one lobe short of a limbic system.