Brain Whisperer Pillows

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

'It's my job to be nosy!'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'Isn't that cute! They're thanking us.'

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

Two old superheroes on a park bench feeding the birds.

A woman drawing birds makes them fly around the room.

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"I finally gave in, I got sick of hearing, 'Polly want a podcast?... Polly want a podcast!'"

"What did you think was going to happen when you filled the feeder with lasagna?"

"Someone's sending us a tweet...it says 'more seed, please!'"

"Oh, she talk a lot...but only about her children."

Why doesn't birdie go soaring on high like other birds?

The art of yoga is the power of the mind.

Steven had a sneaky suspicion that the local birds were beginning to rely upon here.

Computer help.

'It may well be nesting J.T but damn it, you've got a company to turn.'

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

'Mummy Mummy, I want a puppy! Mummy Mummy, I want a puppy!'

"It ain't easy, Doc. There's a lot of pier pressure."

"Arthur, the bird's gone and done it again."

'Oi, call the fire brigade, my foot's stuck.'

"Service."

"Repeat after me..."

"That was the pet store, dear - they want to know if you've noticed any minor flashes of aggression in Joey since starting the steroid bird feed?"

'You know, our health plan doesn't cover dental.'

'I've lost the urge to repeat everything...'

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

'Dear father for what I am about to receive I give thee thanks.'

Feathered frenzy

'Man, you totally passed out last night, so we marked on your head.'