Botanist T-Shirts

"I'm poison oak. I'm pretty sure I'm poison oak.... Or is that poison oak?"

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

If Newton was a Botanist...'Ah, ha, the stem of an apple is not permanently fixed to the tree.'

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

'I ordered an IV, not an ivy.'

'I,m trying something new...giraffe manure!'

"Is this one a flower or a weed?I'm not sure whether to admire it or not."

'This will photograph it, check our global position, scroll our database, name it, text details,play music and oops - the battery's gone dead.'

A dead plant in the environment section.

Pollination Process

"Just the steak for me and my friend will have the carbon dioxide and the water with the sunlight."

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

'It's a dogwood tree. I can tell by it's bark.'

Poplar trees and not very poplar trees.

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'That plant food really works!'

'Frankly - I think this is a monstrous invasion of our privacy!'

'Personally I can't see anything wrong with GM crops!'

"Can you believe that people inhale the gases we expel-sick, right?"

'You know that rare specimen you lost - I think I've found it!'

'What should we do? It's an endangered animal eating an endangered plant!'

'So much for talking to plants. I distinctly heard it tell me to shut up!'

'My hay fever is really acting up.'

Medicinal plants

"I don't know what went wrong."

'A rose by any other name means I flunked the botany test.'

'Congratulations on your 100% plant-based diet. I'm referring you to a botanist.'

'That's why when it comes to botanical expeditions - I never lead!'

Frank realized he needed to change his restaurant's name.

'Heaven welcomes botanists, we've millions of extinct plants that need classifying!'

"I'm in herbs—celebrating the ancient link between women and plants."

"Our privacy policy has changed."

Venus Fly trap buying hot dog

'He's done his back in doctor, searching for bryophytes!'

'I know botanists are important dear, but I wish I could tell people you had a proper job!'