Book Vs Beverage Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Hmmm, let's see... short story, memoir, non-fiction or cocktail?"

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

Reading my Critics

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"I try to write a little bit every day."

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

You're the botanicals in my gin

'Excuse me, but do you have a decaffeinated baristo?'

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

Charles Darwin Book Signing.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

"No—You're thinking dog years—Editor years are twice as many."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

'Meet the author with her collaborators'

"Scotch and water musick."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'Sorry, Marx, but your writing ability doesn't meet our needs.'

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

"Shower beers? Aisle eight."

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

'The King of what?'