Book Phobia Warrior T-Shirts

How to Overcome Your Fear Of Books

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

Tesseract of the D'Urbervilles.

Rita's PhD defense wasn't going well."

"Psst! Hey, kids."

"Didn't read the book, missed the movie, but I've been to the theme park."

Man reads a book while seated in a loveseat as a cat peers over the seat at him.

"Pencil eraser."

"It's all show-as soon as Marks gone he switches off the football and reads Proust..."

"We used your unsold copies to build a tree, but it's not the same."

"You're a writer? But what do you do for money?"

'Professor McWit, crushed by an avalanche of Philosophy 101 texts, proves again that a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.'

"Then the proprietor said, we'll publish and be damned, so we did and here we are."

'We lost your case, but the PR was a success. Three publishers are bidding on your story, and 30 PTAs are petitioning to have the book banned.'

" will enver read that book, and I"m eagerly waiting to avoid the movie."

'For claustrophobia. Take two tablets right before hiding under the bed.'

"Bill and I hate the same books."

Reading

Banned Books

"What do you mean you're staying in with a good book?"

"This is crazy! Why can't they give us one e-reader with all our school textbooks already on it? That way...I can ignore just one book instead of this whole stack!"

Psychiatry. It's funny. You're a germaphobe and the last patient on that couch has a phobia about soap!

Why are you so hostile toward books? Um, where to start: The waste of paper, the lack of multimedia, the one-way nature of the medium. One-way? Authors stuff ideas down your throat. You can't interact with their ideas. You can't crowdsource the direction, or refine the plot or do anything active. You can't shoot anyone. Shoot? I might play a shooting app called Angry Books if the books you were destroying were cute.

Book Signing. "The Inflation Diet." How does it work? You spend the same amount on food each week and the rest takes care of itself.

"Oh, Hailey! You're so beautiful in the glimmer of the bonfire! If I didn't know it would make you pregnant, I'd give you a great big kiss!"

Disaster strikes Dilmont Publishing.

How to manage stress...

'Don't be frightened, he's only been 'n' gone 'n' done his back in again.'

DO NOT DISTURB

Christian Book Shop has sign saying 'We have Noah's Ark' whilst the Weather Bureau next door has sign saying 'You're gonna need it'.

iDad.

'Instead of a bonus, Samson, here's an autographed copy of my book, 'The Seven Habits of Highly Stingy People'.'

"A little bit less television, a little bit more books on tape. What's your New Year's resolution?

'Yeah, my bad eyesight is probably due to too much reading in the dark...'

"I swear! As soon as she saw me, she jumped onto a chair and started screaming! It was hilarious..."