Book-loving Uncle Pillows

Around the Dogbox in 80 Days.

Little dog in Romance section in bookstore under sign: 'Puppy Love'

'And the cat is due back in 2 weeks.'

Isabel Allende

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

"Nixon was the same way when he first got here."

Dog traps the postman.

'Sorry Ben, I never noticed the baby-sitting clause in the stud contract.'

Conservative Leadership Renounces Protectionism

Help!I am being forced to eat vegetables

The Last Non E-Book In The World.

'Y'know it started as a bedtime story he told his kids.'

"I'm feeling like there's a 'good boy' on this side of the room."

"Virginia Woolf meets 'Car Talk.'"

"Let's try one with your hand tucked into your shirt."

Pianist.

'Who called me a quack?' (boy has duck on his knee in vet's surgery).

With Jury Duty for All

"No sense of smell, ears plugged and eyes fixed on their phones. I'm telling you, if I weren't domesticated I'd be all over that."

President Grant's Civil Service Reform is not to the Taste of Either Party, despite Professed Enthusiasm

Books-CDs-Tapes.

Lesser Known Historical Figures: The Steno at the First Thanksgiving Dinner.

Mobile Phones

"Russia's always bigger than you think."

Santa Claus walks dogs

'I didn't spend $49.95 on this answering machine to have you just hang up so leave a message!'

'I realize it's not much of a war, but it's all we can afford right now.'

99 Dalmations - Edited for television.

"Museum directory: Male statues with big d**ks. Female statues with huge tits & fat butts."

Boris Johnson related to Mummy

"My report is on the three branches of government - checks, balances, and subpoenas."

Mrs Gummidge casts a damp on our Departure

'1815 - the night before the Battle of Waterloo, Napoleon seems a tense and pre-occupied.'